Today Louis is one month old. One page of the wall calendar has turned over since his arrival. One month of joy and sleeplessness and of lots of crying. Crying by both of us. I cry in amazement at his perfection. I cry happy tears and of course I cry sad tears. Would Alice have tried to suck her thumb like Louis? Would she have settled so easily in my arms? Would she...? I know it does no good asking these questions in my mind. Just hard not too.
Today the pediatrician checked Louis' heart again. He listened much longer than perhaps he needed too. He knows about Alice and her poor little heart that was never going work the way it should. So he listened as my sweet Louis screamed and cried and made certain that the world could hear him.
And his heart is fine. Beating like it should. Able to beat for a very long, long life.
Relief. Tears of joy. And tears for his big sister Alice.